Noticing…
I have been seeing various clients in my practice this week…all ages, couples, individuals…it has been a good week! One theme keeps arising throughout my sessions with clients. Noticing. I think our world has been so set up for distraction that the simple act of noticing is becoming more rare. Here are some examples…
Relationships among partners…the act of noticing your partner’s efforts to make you happy or bring you joy. Appreciation brings connection…even in small ways. It is that whole ‘pennies in a jar’ concept. If you build that feeling of connection in small ways, when you have to have those difficult conversations, you will have created an atmosphere of support and understanding so that your partner won’t feel(as much) the need to defend, attack or withdrawal.
Parent/Child relationships….If you notice your child making good choices or helping out in ways or even engage in their silence with a hug or pat on the back, you’ve opened the door for them to come to you in the highs and lows they are experiencing.
In Yourself…Do you notice what your body is feeling? When you are calm, do you notice what the circumstances are that are allowing this feeling? When you are stressed, do you notice your own self-talk? What are you saying to yourself? Is it true? Is it helpful? Is it kind?
Recently, I am paying attention to people’s faces and body language. Have you ever let yourself sit at a park or in the mall and just watch people? We are amazing creatures. The deep breath, sighs, glances, shrug of shoulders and sooo…much more! Full conversations can happen without one word.
This week, I hope you begin to notice more around you, within you and in your relationships.
Melissa Lewis-MFT
Article Written by Melissa Lewis
Credentials: B.S. Education, MFT Masters degree, Certified Prepare-Enrich Premarital Counselor, Member: AAMFT, Professional Educators of TN, Theta Nu Upsilon Counseling Academic and Professional Honor Society, Brain Spotting Trained, EFT trained
